TAMPA (FBW)—Citing half a dozen recent instances where both men and women gave in to moral degradation, Dorothy Patterson told a packed room of women attending a luncheon Nov. 10 they must put a "fence" around themselves, their daughters and their husbands, in order to avoid tragedy.

They should also avoid wearing "skin tight" clothing, establish mentoring relationships that teach women to be godly, and to be "reverent" in their behavior.

Distracted for a moment by the thought of what she said people were wearing at the Pastors’ Conference the night before, Patterson said she saw ladies and young girls coming and going in "tight blue jeans" and "hip huggers."

"But skin tight clothing is just not appropriate outside your closet or your dressing room or your husband’s bedroom. Satan, he will go after you more than any woman on the pew," she told the pastors’ wives. "If he takes you down, your family down, he can destroy a whole church.

"You better believe you are a primary target of the evil one," Patterson added. That’s why women need to be equipped to teach others their roles and what kind of people they ought to be, she said.

"God’s Word is the only place where we will get a sure and solid Word," said Patterson, wife of Paige Patterson, president of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth, Texas, and a past president of the Southern Baptist Convention. She was the speaker at the first-ever women’s luncheon held during the Florida Baptist Pastors’ Conference in Tampa.

Dorothy Patterson, who is an established scholar and teacher in her own right, said being a mother and grandmother is more important than anything else.

"The priorities are there and they ain’t gonna change!" she said, noting her misuse of grammar to make her point. "I don’t care how gifted and how many degrees you have. I don’t care what you have if you move away from sound doctrine ... clearly stated in Scripture."

Basing her observations on Titus 2, Patterson said spiritually mature women teaching other women is imperative if families are to stay intact.

Telling the story of a feminist who took the platform away from her while she was speaking to a group of women, Patterson said the woman told her it was "ridiculous" to say women should teach women and children.

As someone who "loves women," Patterson said she found it difficult to believe the woman’s assertions.

"Women are the greatest influence..," she added. "Women are made for that role.... made to form lives and give influence. We women have such a tremendous responsibility there."

Telling women it wouldn’t hurt for them to "have a little formal study along the way," Patterson said it is also important for them to spend time in prayer and to "listen" to what God has to say. "He can still speak in that still small voice," she said.

Speaking to Titus 2:2, on the instruction that women be "reverent," Patterson said: "Holy dignity with silence may be the better way for some of us."

Describing a typical hectic Sunday morning in most ministry households, where the mom gets the preacher, the kids, and then herself ready — Patterson said the mom is probably a "little ticked" by the time she gets to church—but probably puts on a different attitude for her Sunday school class.

This reverent behavior is about a "lifestyle" of behavior; about "doing everything in a certain way," Patterson said. This includes the way women dress, talk, act, and their inner attitudes, and becomes "something they wouldn’t be ashamed to take to the house of the Lord and put on public display."

"That’s where we start spiritually mature women," Patterson said of teaching young women. "[It is] in the home as a sacred liturgy unfolding in the presence of God."

Gossip is not a part of this reverent behavior, said Patterson. And that includes truthful information that is spread without all of the facts, out of context and for no apparent reason. "Be careful even how you use truthful information" and whether it will "glorify God" Patterson warned.

Drawing from Titus 2:3, Patterson said people used to simply skip over the verse related to drinking, but now it has become a debated point. Relating a time when she and her husband were at a state dinner given in their honor in Israel, Patterson said she simply told her host she was a Nazarite when he asked what kind of wine she enjoyed.

Calling it a "beautiful opportunity" to witness, Patterson said the host was not offended by her sensibilities. "It’s far better to stay away from the edge of the cliff," she said.

Titus 2:4 instructs women to "admonish" the others, to literally "persuade" them that "godliness is the way to purity."

"It is worth the effort to teach them," Patterson said. "You are to reach out and draw them in."

The curriculum is simple. Women are to teach other women to love their husbands and their children. "A novel idea," Patterson quipped. "You know it almost is today. Isn’t it sad you wait long enough and it almost is?" she sighed.

Helping to restore a sense of modesty is also an important part of teaching women to be godly, Patterson said. "It’s just saying that something we have known from infancy; women have been entrusted with this influence towards modesty — it’s no accident Paul would put in this passage — we are to be discrete and discerning in our own character. There is this sense of control in our lives that helps us to know what is appropriate."

Referring to a book on modesty written by a secular author, Wendy Shalit, entitled simply, Modesty, Patterson called it informative and substantive.

"This being discrete is so critically important," Patterson said. "All of these things come from that root... . It is an attitude inside of you that governs what you do."

Being discrete should not be confused with "the dampening down of one’s allure," however, Patterson maintained. "Shrouding sexuality in the beauty of mystery" allows the body to be "revealed in God’s time."

This concept is a "natural link to male obligation," Patterson asserted. "Why should a man honor a woman if she doesn’t think it’s important? What reason would a man have for rising to the occasion for honoring her?"

Keeping a home beautiful is also important said Patterson. "Martha Stewart is going to prison. What in the world are we going to do?" she joked.

"It’s a choice. Don’t be griping and whining," she added. "You know God chose the relationships in a home to reveal Himself. When we tamper with that .., what [we’ve] done is to undercut God’s revelation of Himself."

In a Q&A session at the end, one woman mentioned the difficulty of teaching about modesty in Florida’s beach communities and another mentioned church weddings where the brides — and her bridesmaids — dress less than conservatively.

Patterson suggested charm and modeling classes for the beach communities and taking an approach that provides role models for them.

"Let the Scripture be your back-up," Patterson said. "A girl is a natural reservoir of modesty and only when she’s been tampered with is that going to change."

"When we meet resistance ... perhaps come to it from a different direction," Patterson suggested. In the case of church weddings, she said work on a wedding policy that provides a church consultant, at no charge, who can advise in this area and let the policy include positive wording that encourages the selection of "modest apparel" that will "honor the Lord’s house."

"Pouring dirt" on the families who are already struggling to afford a wedding and to pay church fees is not the way to create harmony. Instead, Patterson suggested having the families be more involved in the event.

In using resources on modesty, Patterson told the women to not be "lazy" and to use the resources in a way that will meet their needs. "Don’t just take the material from the bookshelves. Teach those who will build the bridge."