Kingdom Families essential to a strong denomination

BRANDON (FBW)—"Strong families making strong churches, makes for a strong denomination," Florida pastor Forrest Pollock said Oct. 2 at the second of three Kingdom Family conferences across the nation this fall.

Pollock, pastor of Bell Shoals Baptist Church, Brandon, served on the Southern Baptist Convention’s Council on Kingdom Family Life for the past three years. Oct. 2-3 his church hosted the conference promoting the new strategy for building Kingdom Family Churches—a part of a larger Empowering Kingdom Growth (EKG) emphasis promoted by the SBC Executive Committee and LifeWay Christian Resources.

The Kingdom Families Conference at Bell Shoals drew more than 80 leaders from 18 churches in four states-Florida, Georgia, Tennessee and Alabama. Pollock told Florida Baptist Witness in an Oct. 2 interview he believes the conference is one step in an emphasis he hopes will continue to grow.

"I really believe we see the beginning of a movement in the SBC as hearts are turned toward the heart of God, which is the home," Pollock said. "These pastors are going to take what they have learned here ... to the highways and byways of Florida and beyond and we are going to see slowly, intermittently, a change in both the perception of the SBC and also in the strength of the families."

The 24-hour conference offered five 90-minute sessions which included information about: premarriage counseling, a Kingdom-focused church, expressing the love of God, listening, and forgiveness.

Speaking to leaders about their own marital relationships, Pollock said he believes the relationship between a minister and his wife can be unique and present its own set of difficulties. Recognition of the different ways men and women communicate can be the beginning of understanding, he said.

"Since we are different, we have trouble communicating," Pollock said. "We all do."

Citing Philippians 2:3 as an example, Pollock said Scripture makes clear the need to consider others’ needs.

Pollock said a book by a popular author points to differing needs men and women say they have.

Women say they need affection, conversation, honesty and openness, financial support and family commitment, said Pollock. On the other hand men list sexual fulfillment, recreational companionship, spouse’s attractiveness, domestic support, and admiration as things they most need in a relationship.

"What strikes me about these two lists is that there is no overlap whatsoever," Pollock said.

Using his own list, Pollock went on to describe what he believes every minister’s wife needs from her husband and what every minister needs from his wife.

A wife needs time, talk, touch and trustworthiness, Pollock said. She needs to know the house and cars are not going to be repossessed and she needs to trust her husband at his word.

"T-i-m-e is how ladies spell love," said Pollock. "Men can be stimulated visually into an affair; women by touch. Let your wife know that you care."

Conversely, a minister needs acceptance, applause and affection—and a wife with a very short memory.

"He needs you to forget some things," Pollock said. "Normally we admire people with good memories; but forget every sermon in the first two years of his ministry and ... forget some of the theological lines he has drawn in the sand. He is trying to preach a life he aspires to himself. He can fool the church most of the time, but he needs you to forget.

"No minister is an ideal husband, no wife is an ideal wife," Pollock said. "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit."